Through gritted teeth

My daughter just walked into the living room and said "Dad, cancel my
allowance immediately, rent my room out, throw all my clothes out of the
window, take my TV, and stereo, and iPhone, and iPod, and my laptop. Please
take all of my jewellery to Cash Converters. Then sell my new car, take my
front door key away from me and throw me out of the house. Then disown me
and never talk to me again. And don't forget to write me out of your will
and leave my share to my sister.
Well, she didn't put it quite like that... She actually said...
"Dad, this is my new boyfriend, Mohammed."

:whistle:

53,000 Scousers meet in Anfield for a 'Scousers Are Not Stupid' convention.
Steven Gerrard addresses the crowd.. 'We are all here today to prove to the world that Scousers are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer please?'
Wayne Rooney gingerly works his way through the crowd and steps up to the stage.
Gerrard asks him 'What is 15 plus 15?'
After 15 or 20 seconds Rooney says, ' Forty!'


Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then the Scousers start chanting 'Give him another chance! Give him another chance!'
Gerrard says, 'Well since we have a capacity crowd, world-wide press and global broadcast media here, I think we can give him another chance.'
So he asks, 'What is 5 plus 5?'
After nearly 30 seconds he eventually says, ' Twelve?'



Gerrard looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh.
Everyone is disheartened and Rooney starts crying.
But then the 53,000 Scousers begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, 'Give him another chance! Give him another chance!'
Gerrard, unsure whether he is now doing more harm than good eventually says, 'OK then, what is 2 plus 2?'
Silence hangs over the stadium.
Rooney closes his eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, 'Four?'



Pandemonium breaks out throughout the stadium as the Scouse crowd stand to a man, wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream,
'Give him another chance! Give him another chance!'


:whistle: